Ohhhh, The Vampire Diaries - I'm not going to lie; you kind of confused me tonight. I mean, you were okay and all, but kind of predictable. Not to mention you puzzled me with the following: 1) random, seemingly meaningful interactions, 2) convenient spells, 3) Bonnie's living situation and 4) who the hell was that at the end?
Maybe by the time I type this all out it will make more sense.
Let's get started shall we?
o o o
We open up with Alaric/Klaus going through Alaric's closet. Alaric/Klaus scoffs at Alaric's choice in plain clothing, likening him to Safari Sam. That made me giggle, but honestly anything would at this point, because I am giddy and in love with this story line.
As he gets dressed A/K asks Katherine to finish up telling him what she knows. She lets him know that the dagger and white ashes are still with the Slavatore brothers and Alaric/Klaus tells Katherine that the dagger needs to stay exactly where it is - the last thing he needs is Elijah to be resurrected ("that guy is a buzz kill") Remember this conversation kiddies - it's the stem of one of the most confusing parts in this episode.
Katherine begs Alaric/Klaus to kill her as she's told him all that she knows. A/K says not so fast - he believes that she believes that, but he's sure she knows more. He Compels her to tell him what she thinks the Salvatore brothers are hiding from her and she spills about the witch burning site and trying to restore Bonnie's powers. She doesn't know if Bonnie has her powers back or not and she begs, again, for him to kill her. Instead he hands her a knife, stating that he's been chasing after her for five hundred years and her death will take at least half that. He Compels her to stab herself in the leg over and over and over and over again while he's out, throwing a casual 'if you get bored, switch legs' over his shoulder as he goes.
Dang, Klaus is cold.
Love it !
o o o
Elena is signing contracts - the boarding house is officially hers! Paaaarty! Bonnie is with her and she is impressed that Stefan and Damon would give away their house, claiming she would never want to clean it. Oh, the woes of owning a humungo, expensively wood paneled home!
Outside on the stoop, Damon and Stefan discuss weather Bonnie can really take down Klaus. A silence falls and Damon asks if Stefan thinks Klaus killed Katherine already and Stefan says most likely. Damon says she'd deserve it if he did but you can tell they both feel funny about the idea of Katherine actually being dead.
The man with the papers leaves and Elena invites Stefan in right away but makes a big production when it comes to Damon. She makes Damon promise to "obey the owner of this house?" At this, Damon and I both do a 'what the fuck' face. Already Elena is obnoxious. News Alert - this may be your house in writing, but this is still the Slavatore brother's home. They offered it to you so you don't DIE. Stop being a dick about it.
Anyway, Damon tells her to stop being ridiculous - of course he's not going to obey anyone - but she makes him promise to always be honest and upfront with her about everything before she allows him in. No shady business or faking deaths or anything like that. He agrees, but c'mon, it's Damon ya'll.
Elena starts to put on her cute leather jacket and when Damon and Stefan ask where she is heading off to, she says shes going to school.
It is pandemonium:
Stefan: School?
Damon: School?
Stefan: What is this school?
Damon: Damnit Elena, what is wrong with you - you just made me promise not to lie and here you are making up places so you can go galavanting without us there to be the worse bodyguards ever.
Stefan: Seriously. He's right Elena. We aren't dumb. We know school doesn't exist.
Damon: *is about to stalk away in a huff.*
Elena: No! Wait! It does exist! We met there, Stefan, remember?
Damon: She's playing you for a fool, Brother-
Stefan: *holds up hand to silence Damon* ...it sounds... vaguely familiar... Huge building? Hosts big dance parties and little else? Alaric's codeword for going to the bar?
Elena: *nods*
There is a beat of silence and a collective 'OOOOOH' from everyone in the room. Damon wipes his brow and Stefan places a hand on his chest, relieved.
After all of this is cleared up, Elena informs them that she's super glad that she owns their house now and can take comfort in that fact, but she's not going to stop living her life. Plus, she's got Bonnie with her and they both know how fiercely she can whip up a wind!
Damon and Stefan both say fine, whatever, and because he is still the worst bodyguard ever Damon has to remind Stefan that he needs to follow Elena everywhere.
The younger Salvatore brother really doesn't seem pleased about going to this school place. If memory serves correctly, the last time he went he met Elena and look where that's gotten him.
o o o
Matt goes to the Forbes house - he doesn't know what to do. He doesn't know how to act around Caroline knowing what he knows. And also, Caroline wants them to go to the dance together!
Liz tells him to suck it up and let her have some time to process all this shit she found out last night. I have to say, I'm impressed with how Liz is handling this. I expected her to already have her war cry picked out and wooden bullets at the ready. I expected Caroline to be dead by now, stabbed in her sleep. Apparently (even though he doesn't know it) Liz is thinking this through this time around.
o o o
Stefan, Bonnie, and Elena are all in class and Elena waves the reason why any of us are here in Stefan's face. It's a flyer! For the the 60's themed dance tonight! Stefan playful shakes his head no, and Bonnie nods yes and it's a cute moment. They should go to school more often.
A/K walks in and literally says "what are we learning?" A student has to remind him, but no one questions this. No one thinks this is odd and why should they? He's only taught this class twice at the most, and the majority of that first class was teaching them how to say his name. He catches sight of Elena and stares. And stares. And stares. Again, no one really thinks its odd that he looks at Elena like he wants to rape her - they just all make sure their bottle caps are secure - they've all heard how good he is at drugging drinks.
When he finally tears his eyes away, A/K goes on about the sixties, but not really. Basically says that they sucked and then starts rattling off random events that went down during that time. He accidentally says Watergate and Elena corrects him, informing him that that was in the 70's and accidently calls him Ric. The students notice that and the weird energy is just that much stronger.
I wonder how many students think something weird is going on between them now.
A/K looks away and stares at a wall, and no one thinks its weird because Alaric is the resident alcoholic.
o o o
Matt kisses Caroline in the parking lot and its so sweet because she is so happy, but that makes everything worse because it's all a lie. A dirty, dirty lie! This story line - I'm torn on it. I see where Matt is coming from, but I love Caroline.
They talk about the dance and kiss and it's sad/sweet.
o o o
Jeremy and Bonnie argue in the lunchroom about Bonnie being suicidal but Jeremy gets nowhere by the time Elena interrupts. Elena asks if he's okay since Jenna is probably getting high somewhere and UDJ is the only other person living in the Gilbert house. He gives her a look that practically screams 'how does you think I'm doing' then begs off, stating he's late for class.
That student from earlier who let A/K know what he was supposed to be teaching comes up to their table super excited. She's got gossip: a really hot guy named Klaus asked her to ask Elena if she is going to the dance tonight. Both Bonnie and Elena are spooked and ask her to point him out. Random girl trips up and says she can't because she doesn't know if he's in the lunchroom and they realize she is compelled. Random girl goes on to say that this Klaus fellow asked Elena to save him the last dance.
I don't care what anyone says - that's pretty cute. Kinda creepy, but cute.
o o o
Back at the boarding house Damon lays out the plan - they go to the dance, find Klaus and let Bonnie loose. Stefan says he doubts its going to be that easy. There's a knock at the door and it's A/K... who can walk right in? Okay, that makes sense - he's in Alaric's body, but if this is the case how can he Compel? Is it because him being in Alaric's body is such a mental thing that he can still control people mentally? But only vampires can Compel and technically Klaus is a human right now. Am I thinking about this too hard? Should I just let this weirdness pass me by? Fine, I'll let it go.
Anyway A/K comes in and Damon says he needs to be a chaperone tonight - here's to hoping he's better at this than Stefan. Right away they launch into the plan of attack. Bonnie says that she's the plan, stating that Klaus has no idea that she has all this power. A/K says that it's gotta be pretty hard to take down an Original and Damon begins to agree before rushing Bonnie as a test. She easily takes him out and everyone is super impressed. Bonnie says she can kill him and A/K is super worried.
During this whole conversation Alaric is acting pretty oddly - moving differently, talking differently and no one bats an eye. Maybe I notice because I know what I know, but at least Damon should be able to pick up on it, them being besties and all.
o o o
A/K is back at Alaric's house looking for something 60's, complaining to both Katherine and Maddox (that's what that 'witch' is named) about Bonnie being crazy strong. He stumbles across Alaric's hunting gear in the drawers and says that that explains the way he dresses.
Maddox hands A/K some bourbon and he's gross. I don't like his face at all, and he's gross, and why is he here? Anyway A/K tells Maddox he needs to take care of Bonnie, but Maddox says with Bonnie's powers she'll sense him coming from a mile away, A/K needs to do it. A/K exclaims how the hell is he supposed to do this in Alaric's VERY human body. Maddox informs him there is no way a witch can channel that much power without them being killed and says he'll do a spell to make Alaric's body stronger. That way A/K can provoke Bonnie into attacking again and again until she's drained.
Okay, problem - if this is the case, if Bonnie can be taken out by a human body with a spell on it, why doesn't Maddox just do that spell on the real Klaus? The vampire Klaus. Bonnie would try to defeat him, won't, and then die. Unless Klaus doesn't actually have a body at all and lives in a jar? Did they explain that yet, what this whole thing is?
Whatever.
Katherine has been listening to this whole conversation very closely. Remember that I guess? I really don't know, mainly because I don't understand the last sequence of this episode.
o o o
Caroline is dressed up like a blonde Jackie O and is adorable! Liz is horrible at acting like nothing is up. Caroline asks what's wrong and Liz says that it's just work stuff. Then Matt shows up to take her to the dance. The happier Caroline is the sadder this whole situation gets.
o o o
Elena is digging through boxes in Stefan's house looking for an outfit for the dance. It's between Twiggy and 'sexy hippie.' I vote Twiggy! Even though from the previews she goes as a sexy hippie. Although I find it very hard to believe that the Salvatore relatives just happened to have outfits that could fit Elena so well, but I digress. She's super nervous about the plan tonight and Stefan lets her know that she can back out anytime she likes. Elena says no, she's down with the business, it's just that Klaus has been talked up so so much, she was starting to forget he was actually real and not just some myth. Stefan lets her know tonight is the night Klaus is stopped once and for all (because he doesn't know there are still four episodes left this season) and they kiss.
Elena tells him she loves him, convinced she is going to die, and Stefan says for her to say that later on when everyone is still alive. Everyone except for Klaus that is. They kiss some more and Damon is in the doorway, saying "any day now."
How long was Damon watching?
Creeper.
o o o
It's a party! The school's real purpose in all it's glory! See, it's a plot device. That's all school is to people in Mystic Falls.
Everyone is dancing, even Alaric/Klaus. He shimmies up to that same random girl from class and the cafeteria and asks if she and her date would like some extra credit. Then he smiles like a pedobear and wiggles his eyebrows. Klaus as Alaric is such a pervert. Somewhere Chris Hanson's radar is going crazy right now. My favorite part of this whole thing is apparently Alaric acts like this all the time, because no one has batted an eyelid at his antics this whole episode. If this is the case, and Alaric really is this way in his everyday life I think I like him twenty times more.
o o o
Jeremy and BonBon are walking up to the school when he stops her and offers her his ring. She tries to play it off with a going steady joke but he insists. She sighs and tells him the ring won't work on her - it was made to save mortals from dying due to supernatural causes and, in case you haven't noticed, Jere, she is a supernatural creature.
Jere is going crazy - he can't just stand around and let Bonnie get hurt. He has to do something. Bonnie tells him that all because some age old witches who know way, way, more than her and have decades of experience gave her a warning doesn't mean they're right. She could survive, could have a 50/50 shot at this whole thing.
Then Jeremy says probably the most hilarious line ever uttered in the whole of this series - "Look, I'm sorry but you know I don't have the best luck in the girlfriend department." It's funny because it's true. So, so true. I laughed way too long and way too hard at this scene and almost missed more of Bonnie's lies about being an adequate witch.
She placates him, kinda, with a hug and meets Damon's eyes in this weirdly intense way over his shoulder. Damon wriggles his eyebrows, she says his name, he says hello and wriggles eyebrows some more and Bonnie looks flustered.
That was a weird moment. Why did that happen?
o o o
That random girl is on screen again and this time she is on stage at the mic. All I have to say about this party is that I'm sure the sixties was nothing like that. Anyway she's at the mic, thanking everyone for coming and whatnot. Then Elena and gang walk in and the girl at the mic says it's shout out time! Cause that happens all the time at high school dances. And this shout out is from Klaus! She then proceeds to look right at Alaric who's looking about as guilty as OJ Simpson. But, as we will see as a pattern in the next few scenes, Elena and gang are not able to put two and two together - even if Alaric/Klaus were to stand in front of them and tell them he is Alaric/Klaus.
Which he does, eventually.
o o o
Damon says that shout out business was super lame and he's not impressed, Sir! Elena looks around and says she knows everyone in the room and that boggles her because Klaus would of course inhabit a stranger's body and go to a school dance where she is present. Damon tells them to calm the hell down and blend, and Bonnie jumps in and agrees right away. Why is that happening? Why is Bonnie with Damon? (Rhetorical question. I know exactly why that is but I'll get to that later.) Bonnie drags Jeremy off to dance, Damon spots A/K, and Stefan asks Elena to dance.
Damon slides up to A/K and A/K says, in this voice almost bursting with pride, that this Klaus dude must be a diabolical genius - dedicating a song to a girl! Imagine that! Damon's all 'that was lame' and A/K looks like a kid who's parents told him that his shitty finger painting was shitty. I agree with Damon - that was super lame. And I'm going to say this as well - Klaus is lame. Very, very lame. Alaric as Klaus makes me happy because Klaus makes Alaric into a creeper who frolics about town and acts crazy, but Klaus is supposed to be this big bad super Original and the most he can do is - dedicate a song to a girl? And then be super hurt when people aren't impressed?
I was pumped about Klaus fighting Bonnie because I thought Bonnie would get thrown about a bit because Klaus is just THAT great, but I've just realized this might be the lamest throw down ever - a witch who can make it rain and a vampire who is the equivalent of Dennis the Menace. Riveting.
Anyway, A/K is butthurt that his dedication wasn't scary enough and Damon leaves. Let me point out the camera purposely shows Damon passing behind Jeremy and Bonnie, therefore putting Damon and Bonnie in another scene together. A/K tries to gather himself while Elena and Stefan are dancing. Caroline comes in with Matt and Elena remembers that no on has filled Caroline in yet, so Stefan goes over to explain while Damon comes to dance with Elena.
They dance and it's cute. Well, Damon is cute. Alright, fine, Damon is ADORABLE in this scene, and makes Elena laugh, and tells her not to worry because at the last decade dance they took down a big scary vampire and this time won't be any different. They have a moment when Damon twirls Elena and she looks at his lips, telling him that he's good at dancing. He murmurs in her ear that he has moves she hasn't even seen before and Damon/Elena shippers every squeee.
o o o
Caroline and Matt dance and Matt has a weird 'I know what you are expression' on his face. Caroline asks what's wrong and he just tells her that she looks super pretty tonight. She's really happy and her story gets sadder. Poor Caroline.
Stefan ambles up and tells Caroline the deal with Klaus and to keep an eye out. I wish they'd told her this earlier - Caroline would have probably been the only one to notice that Alaric is acting insane.
o o o
Damon interrupts Bonnie and Jeremy dancing and Jeremy goes without a fight. And then commences another confusing factor in tonight's episode - what the crap is going on with Damon and Bonnie?
They begin to dance and Damon questions her about her lies to Jeremy in the parking lot. She admits that they were falsehoods and confirms that she would sacrifice herself for Elena no matter what. This conversation is all fine and dandy - what makes it odd is the fact that they are dancing against each other sexily and basically flirting their brains out. When did this happen? When did Bonnie and Damon even get on speaking terms let alone 'flirting heavily in hippie wear' terms? And I get it - the show is trying to give us a reason why Bonnie would listen to Damon in a later scene when he suggests something drastic but still, this is coming out of nowhere. It's jarring and takes me out of the story because not only am I busy trying to remember what episode it was that Damon and Bonnie could begin to look at each other without malice, but I'm also busy wondering how I would feel if these characters were to have anything going on. To be honest, I prefer Bonnie without anyone; she needs more time to work on her craft cause she is suuuuuh-huh-huh -king at this whole witch thing. But if she had to be with anyone, why not Damon? God knows it's better than being with Jeremy, with whom she has no chemistry whatsoever.
Anyway, Damon lightly inquires if there is a way for Bonnie not to die. Bonnie answers back with a "Careful Damon, I might start to think you might actually care." Word, BonBon.
Damon says he (and the show) would never want that confusion, but I'm calling bull.
We know what you're up to, show. We know.
o o o
Across the room Jeremy watches them rub their bodies together and realizes that he may not lose his girlfriend to death but to Damon Salvatore! Hah! Elena asks him if he's okay, but his poker face sucks as he says he's fine and walks away.
o o o
Jeremy wanders off into the empty hall ways and Stefan goes after him. After some prodding Jeremy finally spills that killing Klaus will end in Bonnie-cide. Stefan is all nuh-uh and Jeremy is like 'would I lie about another girlfriend dying?' He was annoying for a while so I didn't mind him not being on screen, but this episode reminds me of how compelling Jeremy can be.
He explains that he doesn't know what to do because the way he sees it, it's between his sister and his girlfriend. Awww sad Jeremy is sad. EVERYTHING HE LOVES DIES. Well, mainly just the women. Why is it that all the women in Jeremy's life don't really work out? Think about it:
Mother - dead
Elena - need I say more?
Jenna - can be summed up by her choice to move to the dorms
Vicki - was a druggie who denied him again and again for Tyler (when Tyler was still a jerk) Also, turned into a vampire and got killed right in front of him.
Anna - vampire. Snatched from his hands and killed.
Bonnie - is willing to kill herself for another person on this list.
Jeremy's life is horrible.
o o o
Damon is dancing! I swear, Ian Somerhalder is at his best when he's dancing. (Boarding house underwear dance party anyone?) Bonnie is watching him, smiling when Elena rushes up and says they need to talk. Bonnie shoots Damon a dirty look, thinking it was him who spilled the beans.
Stefan grabs Damon and is like 'you knew and didn't tell anyone?' Damon says hell yeah he didn't and Stefan reminds him of his promise to Elena earlier in the day about subterfuge. Damon says he changed his mind about all that, and Stefan does this hilarious face that reads 'I shoudda known!'
o o o
Elena drags Bonnie outside and they argue. Elena will not allow Bonnie to die for her and Bonnie insists that she's the only one who can stop this. They go back and forth and Bonnie asks the question - if the situations were reversed, would Elena die for her?
Ehhhh, yes and no.
Yes, Elena would die for people - remember, that was her 'thing' was for like, three episodes and you had to seal her in her own house.
No, Elena wouldn't die for you - as you may also remember, when Elena was planning to kill herself, she disregarded not only you but Tyler as well. She was only in it to save Stefan, Damon, and Jeremy.
Diplomatically, Elena doesn't answer and Bonnie, bless her, takes the silence as a yes.
o o o
Jeremy is walking down the deserted hallway and that guy that Alaric/Klaus leeringly offered extra credit to saunters up along with a few other guys. Let me point out that he is dressed like John Travolta from Saturday Night Fever - i.e white suit and everything. They gather around Jeremy menacingly and I have a flashback to that scene in West Side Story. You know, the dance fight scene. Anyway they start to beat the crap out of Jere but the Salvatore brothers run up to save him. But wait! One guy has a stake launcher and shoots Damon in the chest.
The boy is quickly disarmed and Stefan tells Damon not to kill him. When Damon snarls why, Stefan, having learned from that one time yesterday when Elena was kidnapped, that this is what a distraction looks like. Progress has been shown. Damon knocks the boy out and runs away (at normal speed?) to find Bonnie and Elena.
o o o
Alaric/Klaus runs up to Bonnie and Elena and say that Klaus has Jeremy. So they follow him back into a dark hallway. I love the smile A/K gives. It's so creepy.
...I have a thing for Creepers.
o o o
So! They are following Alaric/Klaus down, down, down, down the hallway and finally Elena notices something is wrong. Alaric/Klaus laughs and turns around to face them. And here comes the most simultaneously irritating and (unintentionally) funny scene I've seen in a while.
A/K: I just had to get away from all those witnesses!
Elena: *stares*
A/K: *acts insane and tells them both which DECADES he preferred to LIVE in when he was ALIVE for all those DECADES*
Elena: Alaric... have you had your vervain today?
A/K: Of course not - vampires do not ingest vervain.
Elena: Alaric is being Compelled!
A/K: nope!
Bonnie : What? Why is he saying things a vampire would say? Why is he acting like someone who has been possessed by an age old vampire? The same age old vampire we KNOW is possessing someone we know?
A/K: Okay I'll give you a hint. I. Am. Not. Alaric
Elena: *stares... and stares... and stares...*
A/K: * looks incredulous*
Elena: *taps chin with finger*
A/K: ...Really though...
Elena: *fifteen minutes later*...O_O Klaus!
A/K: *gets up from lounging on floor.* Finally. Yes! I am-
Elena: No, that can't be right. Let me try again-
A/K: No! You got it right the first time.
Elena: Are you sure? Because I can guess again.
A/K: ...Alright, you can do what you want. I'm here for the witch anyway.
Elena: *tries to continue guessing*
Bonnie, who has a few more brain cells than out main heroine, throws A/K away from them both with her powers. A/K mentions that he knows a witch too and she's gonna have to hit harder than that. So she does, throwing him all they way across the hall into a trophy case, that shatters glass everywhere.
I wonder what administrators of the school will think when they see all this damage tomorrow. They'll probably gape in disbelief and proclaim: 'those horrible children! No more dances! School is officially shut down ! There is no need for this building to open again!'
Alaric says to fire away, that once this body is dead he can just find another. Maybe Jeremy's.
That would be awesome for the story line.
Just sayin.
Elena is about to guess again when Bonnie yanks on her arm and tells her to run.
Damon runs up and Bonnie tells him what is going on. Damon tells Elena to run and tell dat to Stefan and off she goes.
So it's just Bonnie, Damon, and their crazy chemistry alone in this hallway. What on earth could happen? Bonnie could let Damon know that Alaric is trying to get her to use all of her powers. Damon could insist that she kill him anyway and she could counter with the fact that killing Alaric's body won't stop Klaus one bit. Damon could look pained, and then determined, and then suggest that there is a drastic, super misleading plan that could work. She could agree to that.
Annnnd, now we see why the writers made them buddy buddy this episode - when they weren't Bonnie would probably have never agreed to this plan. Not when she knows that Elena would lose her mind with worry.
I would say "Touche, show" if the set up of this whole friendship wasn't so blatantly transparent.
NEXT!
o o o
Elena runs through the crowd trying to find Stefan. She finds Caroline and Matt and tells her to just stick with Matt. Matt asks Caroline what that's all about and Caroline says brilliantly, "the same old drama." So concise.
o o o
Bonnie finds Alaric/Klaus chilling in the cafeteria. He's twirling a knife in his hand and has his feet up when asks if she wants "to do this the easy way or the hard way." This is the moment that I am struck with how... lame and cliche Klaus really is. You'd think after being alive for FOREVER he would have picked up better intimidation tactics. That dude from the last decade dance was better at being scary than Klaus is and he was half retarded. Remember that? All he could say was, "she looks like Katherine."
Anyhoo, Bonnie breaks the sucker's arm and he sees that they want to do this the "hard way." Ugh, shut up, Klaus.
She breaks his shoulder - and starts bleeding from her nose. Already? Breaking an arm - a human arm - makes her nose bleed already? I could see if it was ACTUALLY Klaus but hes in a human body. A little enhanced with witch powers, but still. He asks her if that is all she's got and she replies with "let's find out."
Yes, lets. Because seriously, guys, she is bleeding already.
o o o
Stefan and Elena run around and finally run into Damon. They want to know where Bonnie is and Damon calmly replies that she's doing what she needs to do. Elena panics and Stefan yells but Damon isn't budging.
o o o
Bonnie breaks A/K's legs, bleeds liberally from her nose, makes the lights flicker on and off, and throws hundreds of flyers around. Literally hundreds. Why the heck are there so many flyers in a place that is shut down most of the year?
She slams the doors locked so Elena and Stefan can't come in and makes the candy machine explode. Elena is damn near trying to break the door down, but Bonnie just looks forlornly over her shoulder at her, eyes crossed and nose streaming. She turns back around and makes the lights explode. That's it. She's not doing anything to Klaus, but she's making bulbs break and more soda machines explode.
Thennnnn she collapses.
Everything ceases, the door flies open, and Elena and Stefan rush in. Elena sobs over Bonnie's lifeless body, begging Stefan to do something when she feels no pulse, but Stefan is basically like 'yeeeahhhh, she's dunzo."
Damon comes in then and tells Stefan to take Elena away while he "deals with the body." Elena freaks out at his wording, but Damon ignores her and says he needs to get rid of Bonnie before Liz finds out. Like that would mean anything - what is Liz going to do besides the nothing she usually pulls out of her sheriff hat? Elena shouts at him and then remembers that this is Jeremy's third girlfriend to drop dead. Props up to Nina Dobrev during this scene; she's ugly, and crying, and emoting and it's all very, very well done. Damon watches her go and then survey's the mess of a scene, coming to one conclusion:
They are definitely shutting this school down.
o o o
Damon throws Bonnie into his trunk and a few familiar questions flit through my mind - how does he never get caught doing this? Where is Bonnie living? Who does she live with? Does Bonnie even have a family?
Jeremy runs up, panicked, asking where the heck everyone is. Damon gives a very convincing 'see, what had happened was' expression.
o o o
Elena sits in front of the fire in the boarding house and Stefan comes to bring her a drink. She says she cant drink anything right now - Bonnie is fucking dead and its her fault. Stefan says no it isn't, it's Klaus's fault, but what he forgets to mention is that it's actually Elena's fault. All of this is because of Elena. She doesn't want it all to happen, but it is, and it is her fault. But Stefan is counting on comfort sex tonight so he's playing the game well.
Damon comes in and Elena jumps up, demanding to know where Bonnie is. Damon tells Stefan to calm Elena down, but Elena keeps on going. He knew didn't he, that Bonnie would die? And he still egged her one didn't he? He says yes and she smacks him around the face, hard. He looks annoyed, and tells her once again to calm the hell down and listen to him.
o o o
Jeremy is in that house where the witches were burned and Bonnie's body is there.
We hear Damon's voice explaining that Bonnie had to die. Klaus using Alaric's body was a total surprise and they couldn't prepare for that. No one could stop him and he wasn't going to stop until he knew Bonnie was dead. He had to believe it. Jeremy starts lighting candles when Bonnie wakes up. They hug and she cries.
Ah, poo. I was kind of looking forward to Jeremy's breakdown. But that's because I'm a horrible person.
Damon says that Bonnie cast a spell and doesn't explain what kind of spell, just throws in that Bonnie is okay.
Wait what? What kind of spell? A spell that will mimic death? A spell that will protect Bonnie from death? There is spell Bonnie can cast for not dying? If that is the case then... that... means that Bonnie can cast that spell during the real Klaus fight and therefore is in no danger? At all.
Well... THAT'S lame as hell. Unless I'm looking at this the wrong way and I didn't get the kind of spell right. If anyone reading this can explain that to me, please do. Please and thank you.
o o o
Stefan tells Damon that he could have let him in on this plan, but Damon scoffs and tells him no he couldn't. Stefan would have been too concerned about protecting Elena's feelings and not Elena's life. He says that when it comes down to it, he will be the one to make all the hard decisions while Stefan's faffs about being soft and caring. In the end, Damon will be the one to keep Elena alive.
Too right.
o o o
Jeremy and Bonnie are still in that house. Jeremy has this really cool computer that I'm thinking about buying in his lap. And, oh my heavens, he pulls out this thing - it's called a MiFi and it can get Internet reception anywhere. ANYWHERE! Even at the murder scenes of a dozen witches! Ya'll should run to the store and snatch it up before all the Originals do.
...
That was the worst product placement I have ever seen in a show. And I watch soap operas.
Just sayin.
Jeremy says that as they are stuck there they might as well have entertainment. Bonnie asks him to tell Elena that she is so sorry, but Jeremy is like 'have you not been listening? We have MiFi' and turns on a web cam chat. Technology, ya'll.
Bonnie and Elena cry and smile. Bonnie apologizes lots and Elena says that it's okay.
o o o
Damon is in his room and Elena is there in her sleep clothes. He sighs and says that Klaus had to think Bonnie was dead and Elena's reaction had to be real enough to fool him. She says she understands why it had to happen that way - in a very awkward line reading she says 'Klaus was fooled and Bonnie is alive.' Why are you summing that up for us? We all saw what happened.
Whatever.
Damon drinks to duplicity and Elena proceeds to lay down the law. Or her version of it. I honestly don't know why - Damon will not listen to nor follow rules if he doesn't want to. She says that she will not allow Bonnie to die for her ever and Damon gives her an annoyed look. He explains that Klaus needs to be destroyed, especially since he will be showing up soon since he thinks Bonnie is down for the count. He tells her that Bonnie is the only way, and Elena says they will find another way. Damon sighs and says sure, alright and Elena apologizes for slapping him in the face. Apology is accepted and Damon lays some information down; if it comes down to Elena and Bonnie dying he will always, always pick Elena to live.
Ugh, I am sick of this. So, so sick of the Damon/Elena thing. She gives him nothing, he gives her everything, blah blah blah. Does this scene mean that this ship is back on track? Why is that back on track?
Anyway, Elena accepts that, leaves, and then proceeds act in the most shady way ever. I think. I'm not sure because her next actions make me think this isn't even Elena at all.
Let me explain.
She leaves his room, sneaks around the house like 007, and sneaks downstairs to the cellar. Then proceeds to pull the dagger out of Elijah's chest. Annnnnd then sits down to wait.
Fadeout.
...
What?
No seriously, what?
I have so many problems with this I can't even begin to-
Okay, I'll try.
1) Right from the get go, what is Elena expecting Elijah to do when he wakes up? To just go along with all that has been happening? To not kill her as soon as he sets eyes on her face? Remember, she was the one to kill him last. My friend Nicole brought this up as well -" I will admit though, when I watched it, I was trying to understand what on earth Elena was going to say this time... 'Hi Elijah, I know this is the second time my people have killed you, but could we just resume that same old deal we had... you know, the one that keeps on not meaning very much by our side but yet we expect you to live by...?' Yeah."
Exactly, Nic. Exactly
2) Why did she even do this? Okay WE, as the mostly omniscient audience, know that the last thing Klaus needs is Elijah to be awake - he was telling Katherine that in the beginning remember? But ELENA does not know that. She might have a hunch, and that this is what she meant when she was talking about a Plan B, but not such a strong gut feeling that she wouldn't at least run it by Stefan or Damon first. That's what made me confused in the first place as to if this was Elena or Katherine. I have to admit, the first time I watched this I thought it was Kat, but then I realized there was no way Klaus's witch would let her get away. And I say Klaus's witch because he seems infinitely more in control than Klaus.
I've decided Klaus is just an arrogant, whiny, petulant childlike thing that most certainly does not and probably will not inspire terror in our hearts.
3) Neither Elena, Stefan, Damon, Bonnie, or Jeremy said anything at all about Elijah this episode. At all. Why is he on Elena's mind? I get it - in Mystic Falls world days equal months, and therefore Elijah was only killed about five days ago, but I'm pretty sure she was not thinking about him this whole time.
Ugh, whatever. This episode, all over, just annoyed the crap out of me - sucky, non-threatening Klaus, stupid spells, insulting fake outs, ambiguous endings.
Yuck, this was kind of a messfest, guys.
Oh well. At least we got to see Damon dance again.
Better luck next week, TVD.
Oh, and -
Elijah is coming back !
YAYAYAYAY!
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